(Rubs temple) Every week I tell myself it’s going to get better and every week i’m disappointed. I know I try to see the best in everything, but WHY dear god why do I think this show’s going to improve? Here’s a hint Hideki. It’s not. Regardless, I’ll talk about this episode. Because…well i’m a masochist that way.

This is one of those half episoders by the way.

The first half starts off with the gang playing the roles of policemen, a detective, and a murder victim. The policemen find a dead body and start to look at the evidence. Deciding extremely quickly this is going to be a cold case, the newbie on the force seems a little concerned at this as well he should. That’s when Osomatsu dressed up as a detective comes in.

It's...funny because he's wearing a sherlock holmes outfit?
It’s…funny because he’s wearing a sherlock holmes outfit?

It turns out though that he’s a TERRIBLE detective having solved none of the cases he’s worked on. He’s actually called “The calming detective” because his only role is to make the police force not feel so bad for not being able to solve a crime.

Once again. This premise isn't funny. It's stupid.
Once again. This premise isn’t funny. It’s stupid.

Throughout the rest of this bit all they do is make jokes like he’s going to solve the crime and then he doesn’t. Not only that there’s a guy in hockey mask with a bloody machete just standing in the background for the entire episode and nobody notices it. This isn’t funny. It’s frustrating and nonsensical. If they’re trying to go for “Laugh because it’s so stupid.” It’s not stupid funny. Stupid funny has to be somewhat grounded in reality for it to work. If everyone is stupid and the straight men aren’t effective in the slightest, it isn’t funny. The reason why comedians work in situations like this is because they play off a straight man. They attempt to make one of the characters the more serious of the two, but everyone else is just as retarded as Osomatsu is. So it takes away from the straight man having any effect.

It doesn't work if EVERYONE is stupid.
It doesn’t work if EVERYONE is stupid.

The jokes in this aren’t even jokes and they drag them out for WAYYY TOO LONG. He runs away after a scream only to run to the bathroom. Okay. Maybe that could be considered funny. However, then he comes back and he has no pants for some reason. Then after that he loses his underpants. You see, they beat their jokes that weren’t even funny to begin with to death.

Another example is the straight man hits Osomatsu for being stupid. then they use this as a recurring joke for the rest of the scene showing more scenes of him hitting him. They don’t know the meaning of “Dead Horse”. and it’s not funny.

The first story wraps up with a lot of being having been killed due to their incompetence and the bad guy apparently felt so calm he surrendered.

Also there's no "S" in Police. Come on guys.
Also there’s no “S” in Police. Come on guys.

The second half of the episode continues with that story of the only girl in the series being an idol. Unfortunately she’s incredibly unpopular. She then however reveals that she doesn’t even like singing. She just wants to be an idol to be popular and have a lot of fans.

...um...at least she's honest?
…um…at least she’s honest?

So she tries to give away free fish at her concerts but the people only come for the free fish.

So she then tries to be an actress playing a fish..woman..thing.

yeah....i don't really get it either.
yeah….i don’t really get it either.

Finally one of the brothers says “Umm… you may have better luck if you drop the fish thing.” So in order to become bigger she does that…..and pilots a giant mech in the shape of herself.

All that "What the fuck am I watching?" Yeah. that's basically every scene of this show
All that “What the fuck am I watching?” Yeah. that’s basically every scene of this show

And the episode ends.

This…I can’t believe i’m still watching this show. Am I hoping for some kind of miracle where the series isn’t going to suck and maybe it will get funny? I’m REALLY trying to find something about this show to enjoy, but it’s hard. None of these characters are fun and enjoyable and I feel like I have to take a shower every episode. I’m able to relate to exactly NONE of the characters. Not just by their actions, but their attempt to even be human beings. Every single character that’s been introduced has been a terrible person, and I don’t care if that’s the attempt, it doesn’t make it good.

Even when these characters feel pain I can’t enjoy it as the characters GIVING the pain are ALSO terrible people. I…I don’t even know WHAT I want from these people. I can’t tell if I want them all to grow up or die at this point. I’m just so tired.

This...I...I don't even enjoy THIS
This…I…I don’t even enjoy THIS

I wonder if eventually they’ll all grow up or this will be the status quo forever. God help us if it is. Speaking of tired, my brain is starting to hurt again. These 2 halves weren’t as insulting as the last ones, but they were just about as stupid. Maybe only SLIGHTLY better, but that’s because when they finished I didn’t want to murder something.

1st half: 3/10
2nd half:: 5/10


This Post Has One Comment

  1. TheVoid

    Honestly the most surprising thing is that Ichimatsu in the hockey mask with the bloody Machete wasn’t actually the killer and instead one of his victims.

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