Oof, while we did get one very sweet moment, this episode was mostly one of a heartache. Both Miyo and Kiyoka have their own respective frustrations that have been reaching the boiling point and we saw how that issue finally spilled over, resulting first quarrel. And man that was sad to watch.
On Kiyoka’s end, he is frustrated with Miyo overexerting herself, not communicating about her pain, and refusal to lean on him. The one sweet (or maybe it would be better described as bittersweet) moment they had this episode was when tried to encourage her to share how she’s actually feeling, so Kiyoka tried to help her do that by being honest about his feelings, how he feels lonely and misses her. He has actively sought to comfort and reassure her that when she’s suffering or in pain, she can lean on him. But we saw how his bottled up frustration of feeling as though she doesn’t trust him blow up when Arata threw presumptions about the way Kiyoka is treating her. And if that wasn’t bad enough, the little shit had the audacity to rub it in Kiyoka’s face how he didn’t know that Miyo had collapsed when she was in town, and that he didn’t deserve to be with her. Now we all know that Kiyoka knew she hasn’t been well because of her nightmares, but not to this extent, mainly because she has been hiding it. And in all fairness, it’s hard to when he has been getting home after dark, and she’s typically in bed by then simply because she’s not in the condition to. Right now the only time he can actively be by her side is at night, watching over her in hopes by holding her hand would give her a bit of comfort. Of course he hasn’t told her that, which was why she was surprised that he knew about the nightmares. Regardless whether that was the right decision or not, I do understand where Kiyoka is coming from. Had he done so, Miyo would only feel guilty and like a burden for keeping him up at night when he should be resting- despite it being his own choice and desire to do so.
So naturally when Kiyoka blurted out how he shouldn’t have let her have lessons in the first place, that really hurt her and he immediately regretted it because that’s not what he wanted to do, say, nor how he wanted the conversation to go in the first place. It made him feel awful to the point it sickened him with the idea he thought he was acting like the Saimori family, and he hated himself for it. Though we all know that it isn’t anything like the sort, especially since his concerns and frustrations is coming from a place of benevolence, where he wants to support Miyo, but she keeps her struggles to herself. And we can clearly see that difference in the reaction when Kiyoka sees her in tears.
But here’s the thing, as much as Kiyoka wants her to lean on him, not only is Miyo not used to it, but right now she doesn’t want to. She’s trying not to be a “bother” or an “additional concern” for Kiyoka to have to worry about when he already has so much on his plate. She can see how busy and tired he is, and just wants him to rest. And then there’s the other part of it, where she feels this is something she must handle on her own in order to prove she is strong enough to be worthy of being his wife. Miyo still lacks the confidence and self-esteem, so devoting herself to her studies is a way of helping her build-up the confidence she wants to have in order to stand tall and proud next to Kiyoka and support the family. However with the nightmares preventing her from getting any proper rest, it’s causing setbacks in her lessons and making her ill– and she’s absolutely sick of it. But what Miyo has yet to learn is that leaning on others doesn’t make her weak or any less capable. Sometimes, such as this very instance, keeping her struggles to herself only does the exact opposite of her intentions, which causes those who care for her to worry about her even more. And most importantly, she needs to learn that overexerting herself won’t do her any favours in terms of making progress she so desperately desires.
So now that Kiyoka has finally identified that Tsuruki is just a cover name for the Usuba family, he’s hoping that by bringing Miyo to them that they’ll be able to help her. That’s why he hired the detective in the first place. However there is kind of major problem in all of this: Kiyoka has yet to explain this situation to Miyo. She still has no idea who the Usuba family is, and what makes them so special. He probably intended to do so in this conversation before the whole situation blew up, but then again, with how frail Miyo’s condition was that evening, I don’t think that conversation was ready to be held. Really it’s a matter of just being unable to get the timing right to bring it up, and unfortunately it looks like it’ll have to be done in a rather abrupt way.
Speaking of Arata… Tch, that meddling little shit. What a bald-face lie to show up at their house in the middle of the day claiming he had an appointment with Kiyoka. (More like arranged it as such to get him out of the house at the last minute to meet Miyo again!) Miyo was far too out of it to really deal with him properly when he showed up at their house, but she did do her best to put her foot down when Arata spoke ill of Kiyoka when he was throwing around his bloody presumptions again about how it’s Kiyoka’s fault for her ailing condition, and how he shouldn’t have forced her to study—yadiyadiya~. Had she been in the condition to do so, I’m sure she would’ve been pretty fiery about it, because she simply will not tolerate any slander against Kiyoka when none of that was his fault.
And boy, did he make his intentions clear why he was there in the first place when he went on about how she has a unique role she can fulfill, and left her his freaking contact. But Miyo was far too out of it to really process what he was saying. However I suppose it goes to show that he might have gravely underestimated Kiyoka’s wits and determination to track down the Usuba family, all for Miyo’s sake. We’ll have to see how that all unfolds next week.
Last thing I’ll mention before I wrap things up: It’s a bit of a shame that they sort of glossed over the story of Hazuki’s failed marriage. I get there really wasn’t enough time, but it is a shame that certain things got left out because unless they were to leave it out later on, they will end up being brought up without full context. This episode also left out some of the things I mentioned last week that I had hoped to see be brought up, so for that reason, after the show ends, I definitely recommend you should either the novel or manga (whichever you prefer) to get the full experience.
Oh and I almost forget! We got a behind the scenes mini doc of the animation process! 😀 Be sure to check it out!